Why you need to know where you are, to know where you're going
You need to know where you are to know where you’re going. It’s a simple concept, really.
But our brains play funny tricks on us all the time. We can look at something or someone and think “I can do that if I get those jeans, or that couch”, believing our lives will be like that in the picture.
This illusion or fantasy is why a lot of us don’t live the life we dream of. Our brains make the jump to how perfect life would be if…..
….I had that home.
…..I was that size in jeans.
….I had that many people follow me on Twitter.
And so we focus on what life could be like. A lot of motivational speakers teach us this, and I agree that it’s important to have a clear vision in your mind’s eye (and on a vision board) of the life you dream of. But I believe it’s equally important to be real about where you are now. Your starting point.
For most of us, there’s is a gap between how we see ourselves and how other people see us. Just think of those hopeful people that show up at X-Factor, believing they can win the show when they can’t sing to save their lives
Having a realistic idea about what your life is like now is the starting point for creating change.
3 steps to close the gap between where you are to where you want to be.
Getting clarity of how you want to live in one of my cornerstones. I think it’s so important to be able to make decisions based on what’s right for you. But it means you have to know what’s right and what you want. To help you find a way to close the gap between where you are now and to where you’d like to be, I have 3 steps for you to dive into. As with all personal development, it takes a little diggin' deep.
Step 1: A realistic look at life now
Take a look at your life as is now. Look at yourself in the mirror, look at your home, your friends and the people around you, how you spend your time, the food you eat, what kind of thoughts you have during the day. Write your answers down.
Here’s some question to help you get started. They are just for inspiration, you can do this any way you like.
how many hours free time do you have per week?
Break down how you prioritize your time in a day
Do you have any obligations at the moment that takes up more of your free time than usual?
What conversations would you have to have with your family if you decide to create a change in your life?
Can you do what you want to do alone or do you need help?
Do you have the knowledge you need?
Do you have the skills you need?
What are you doing already that you are proud of?
What are you good at now?
What do you have to learn to be successful?
What do you know already that’ll help you be where you want to be?
What shift in your mindset has to happen (if any)?
These kinds of questions are helpful because there is no point in taking on a huge project if you have promised to help your best friend pack, move house and decorate the new house in the next two weeks. You might want to wait for a little bit then.
It may sound obvious but we still have a tendency to overbook ourselves around the big holidays and wonder why we become exhausted.
Once you have made a realistic assessment of what your life looks like and figured out where you are now, the next step is to figure out where you want to go. What your goal is.
Step 2: Your goal, where you want to go.
Now you know where you are and how things look, get your goals out of your pocket and into the light.
Where do you want to be?
Where do you want to go?
Write down any goals you have or just one goal. If you want help in setting a goal, I have a post about the HEART-model for goal-setting. Click the link right under this.
And then the exciting final step: figuring out a way to close the gap between where you are and where you want to be.
Step 3: Close the gap: create your plan.
How you close the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, is by planning the steps to take to reach your goal. Closing the gap is the journey of a thousand miles which starts with one step.
I recommend you create a plan. A flexible plan that’ll work for you and how your life is. This is what I help my coaching clients with.
In a nutshell, I suggest you break your goal down into small steps and then plot those steps into a calendar or diary of sorts.
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You can do what you want and be who you want. That little voice inside you that says there’s something else you’d like to experience - listen to that. You don’t have to change your life radically or have expectations of transforming into a different person. Little, tiny adjustments will make a big difference over time.
I write about this because I find it difficult myself to close the gap between where I am and where that tiny voice inside tells me I could be. There is no magic to change. I believe for you (or me) to create changes, we have made the decision to change and then go about finding a way to make it happen. There are many ways we can do that and this post offers you one way. I hope you’ll take what you can use to bring about the change you wish for yourself.
If you want to learn more about how I can help you close the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, check this out